


Levi's Struggle

by clutchesofaname



Category: Shingeki no Kyojin | Attack on Titan
Genre: Bad Characterization, F/M, Intentionally Bad, M/M, Parody, Romantic Angst, Romantic Tension, Trolling
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-08-12
Updated: 2015-08-12
Packaged: 2018-04-14 07:05:19
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,171
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/4555293
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/clutchesofaname/pseuds/clutchesofaname
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Levi Ackerman is a totally hot, ripped member of the Survey Corps who secretly harbors feelings for a certain raven-haired woman with the flowy scarf and stoic face. Will he be able to confess his feelings? Will he slay titans? When will those big-ass trees be dusted?</p><p>Armin is a blubbering baby who wants nothing but to have the affections of his friend, Eren Yaeger. When will senpai return his feelings?</p>
            </blockquote>





	Levi's Struggle

Levi Ackerman was a 160 cm tall ravenette man who was also really ripped and had grey eyes that stared out to the world angrily. He rode horses with the Survey Corps and was really high up in the chain of command in the Survey Corps. One time he met with a titan and killed the titan by spinning really really fast and then he slashed their weak spot on the back of their neck and the titan died. He was really badass.  
He was riding horses with his Survey Corps friends in the forest. “These trees need dusting” he whispered angrily his steel grey orbs hovering about in dismay at the disgusting state of the trees and all the dust they had on them from not being used in a while.  
“Levi trees dont need dusting!!!” Erwin shouted at him over the sound of the horses’s feet stomping angrily while riding through the forest. Erwin was 188 centimeters although no one could tell from looking at him at that moment because he was riding his horse. His ice-colored orbs peered over at Levi’s stormcloud ones. “And how would trees be used stupid?!”  
“Trees are a fascinating point of contention within the titan race!” Hange shouted over them both with her cheeks flushing at the thought of talking about titans. “Sometimes they use them for backscratchers, or toothpicks, or even just knock them over for fun! Titans sure are fascinating” she finished, drooling and wiping her mouth on the woolen surface of the tree-green cloak she was wearing.  
“No one asked your face about titans!” the ravenette shouted angrily back at Hange before his horse stopped at the feet of a titan. They all looked up absolutely terrified.  
The titan was 6 meters high and had hands the size of commander Erwin. The titan smiled fiendishly before reaching down and picking up Erwin by his cloak.  
“ERWIN NO!!!!!!!!!!” Levi roared like the lion he was meant to be. Just then…… a figure clad in the standard survey cops uniform soared through the air and slashed at the titan. The titan’s hand fell off and it roared like a tiger that really hated lions. The figure then made it to the backside of the titan and stuck a sword in their weakspot making the titan fall backwards and die.  
Mikasa Akerman stood on the back of the titan and flipped her soft black hair out of her face. She looked at Levi without an expression on her face. “You know Levi it would help in dire situations such as these if you did not lose your cool and kept your emotions under control much like me” she said without an inflection in her voice. She walked past Levi and back to her horse. “If you arent careful you might get killed!” she then shouted before continuting to ride. Levi blushed. What a girl.

They were back at their base and everyone was cleaning. Levi wanted them to clean so they were cleaning. “Keep dusting maggots” he said as he kicked Eren’s butt from behind.  
“WHAT DO YOU THINK YOU’RE DOING?!” Eren shouted as he stood up and made to bite his thumb. Levi gently touched his wrist and Eren blushed before putting his arm down.  
“Whoa there, easy Eren” he said huskily. Eren blushed and went back to cleaning. Armin looked over at Eren and then away.  
“What is it Armin” Eren asked as his sea-green eyes stared into Armin’s sky-blue ones. Armin blushed and dropped his dustpan sending dust everywhere.  
“I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I j-j-j-j-just want to be as cool as Levi!” Armin shouted his cheeks going to a shade of red normally reserved for women’s lipstick. “Maybe then you’ll finally like me” he added in a very low voice hoping Eren would not hear. Eren did hear and he got VERY ANGRY.  
“HOW COULD I EVER LIKE YOU? ALL YOU DO IS SCREAM AND CRY! I COULD NEVER LIKE YOU!” he shouted as he stormed out of the room. Armin started crying and the tears mixed with the dust to form a disgusting blob on the floor shaped like Eren.  
“WHAT IS THIS SHOUTING ABOUT?!” Levi stormed in and bellowed like a drill instructor. “CLEAN ALL THIS UP OR I’LL TAKE AWAY YOUR SUPPER” he screamed before storming out again. Armin continued to cry as he swept up the dust globs and swore he would never love again.

“Dont you think you were a little hard on Armin after all he is weak and pathetic” Mikasa said without emotion as she leaned against the wall not cleaning. Levi stared her down.  
“He might be weak and pathetic but he opted to join the survey corps so I will be as rough with him as I please” Levi replied with no emotion to his voice. Mikasa would have smirked at his response but smirking was beneath her.  
“You certainly are a man” she said as she turned on her heel and left with Levi being confused in the hallway and Armin’s sobs loud enough to be heard in the center of the city.

Mikasa woke up wearing her pajamas and walked to the door as someone knocked on it in a terse and emotionless manner. She opened the door without rubbing the sleep from her eyes because she’s a badass and doesn’t really care what people think about the state of her eyes.  
Captain Levi stood there with a bundle of daisies in his hand and thrust them at her while blushing profusely. “I picked these for you because they’re cool like you are” he said. She took them and sniffed them before looking at Levi without emotion in her eyes.  
“Thank you very much Captain I enjoy daisies greatly even though they remind me of death and how I could very will die today” she said putting them in a vase she kept on her desk.  
“If you die today then die Mikasa Ackerman” he said getting down on one knee and pulling out a diamond ring. The diamond was made from titans and polished to look like a diamond not made from titans. She screamed and threw her arms around Levi’s chiseled shoulders before saying yes to his marriage proposal.  
They had the marriage the same day. Mikasa wore a white dress that showed off her abs and Levi wore a tight fitting tuxedo that also showed off his abs. Hange gave a scientific explanation as to why their marriage would be the best and all the genetic traits their children would have. Erwin toasted them and wished them great happiness as they slayed titans together. Eren apologized to Armin and said he was just scared because he didn’t know how he felt about him. Armin kissed him and then Eren proposed to Armin after he caught Mikasa’s bouquet after she threw it. Levi high fived Eren before he and Mikasa rode their horses to the forest for their honeymoon but before they could even enter Levi had to clean the trees.

**Author's Note:**

> This was intentionally supposed to be bad. One of my friends has a YouTube channel at Bambilion, and she wants to start reading bad fanfiction on Friday. One of my other friends also loves Levi, and I couldn't resist a chance to intentionally use the fandom characterization of him. Thanks for reading; I promise I can actually write.


End file.
